Yesterday I dropped a knife on my toe. The point of it landed perfectly on the knuckle part of my big toe. It hurt for a few minutes, but when I looked down I wasn't bleeding. So I went about my business straightening up the kitchen, getting people stuff (as usual) and putting things away. After a few minutes I looked down and saw a minuscule drop of blood. I wasn't concerned, but thought since it did bleed, I better investigate further.
So I grabbed me a seat at the dining room table and proceeded to wipe off the drop of blood. When no more surfaced, instead of leaving it alone and letting it heal, I squeezed it to make sure no more blood would come out. It bled. Just a little bit, but enough that made me feel justified when I complained to the Prince that I dropped a knife on my toe and it was bleeding. See? He pitied me and then went about his business after warning me to be careful.
What's the point?
Sometimes I do the same thing with spiritual wounds. Or emotional wounds. Maybe someone has slighted me in some way. At first there isn't a lot of pain. Sure it hurts enough for me to notice it, but there's hardly even any "blood" to speak of. It's just a surface wound. So I try to ignore it and get on with life. But then I want someone to know what happened to me, that I was injured in some way. So I sit and pick at the wound, opening it up again and again to see if it will bleed.
What do I hope to accomplish with that? Pity from others, I suppose. Or maybe justification for my sinful feelings against that person who slighted me.
But you know, just like that tiny cut on my toe, a small wound like that one is willing and quite likely to heal itself in a very short period of time. Had I left it alone, it wouldn't have bled any more than that one little drop. It would have made a tiny scab, closed up, and been fine.
It's only when I decide to make sure it's a real wound that I interrupt the healing process. Instead of focusing on how to best aid healing, (which most times is to clean it and then leave it alone) I am focused on the injury itself. I play the moments leading up to it and the actual happening of it over in my mind, wishing I had done something differently to prevent it.
But sometimes these things just happen. And I don't mean fate, either. When talking of emotional wounds or spiritual wounds, I have to remember that the person who hurt me is human. The reason for their inflicting a wound may be unintentional. Maybe they didn't mean to wound me. Like with my toe: I didn't TRY to drop the knife and have it land point-perfect onto my toe. I probably couldn't do it on purpose if I tried.
And when I mess with the wound instead of letting it heal, I am opening myself up for the possibility if infection, and inevitably a scar. Something I can look back at after, say, a year or so and remember the wound, and what happened to me. And knowing myself the way I do, I wouldn't look at the scar and be thankful the wound was healed, I would remember in minute detail the way it happened.
But I don't want that to be the case. So when wounded in the future, I will be sure to leave it alone. I'll clean it thoroughly with scripture, processing how it happened and making sure I am not at fault in some way also, but then I'll leave it in the hands of the Great Physician to heal me.
And He isn't likely to open it up and leave a scar. He'll make sure the marks are so faint that I will forget it even happened.
And that's as it should be.
Ephesians 4:32 "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."