I Chronicles 29:11 "Thine, O LORD, is the greatness, and the power, and the glory, and the victory, and the majesty:for all that is in the heaven and in the earth is thine; thine is the kingdom, O LORD, and thou art exalted as head above all."

Monday, August 04, 2008

A Public Service Announcement

Are you tired of those pesky child leash laws? See signs like the one below popping up in your favorite neighborhood places? Well, fear no more! Here at KidStop™ we only want to help!


Here's an economical and safe way to make sure YOU don't violate the law. Why should you pay for your child's curiosity? Long gone are the days when children have the rule over parents. Not only will this keep you in concordance with the law, it will teach your child their place. Parenting at its easiest!
See how happy they are? Everyone loves the leash!

Love the hands-free option for your phone and wish you had something similar for you kids? Well, now you can! With this easy to clip-on belt or chair attachment, you can enjoy hours of hands-free parenting. A dream come true!
                                                                                                     
And for those of you with kids who just want to touch everything, we now offer the 'Hands-Off Jacket®'. Place the jacket on the child, secure straps behind their back, attach the KidStop™ leash, and you're set! We'll even embroider their name on the front. Makes a great gift for new moms!

Have an important event to attend such as a wedding, graduation, or funeral? Well worry no more about whiny kids ruining your chance to network. With our patented 'Stay Put Stakes®, you can enjoy the party without giving Junior another thought. Just attach the 'KidStop'™ leash, insert the 'Stay Put Stake'® through the loop at the end, and hammer securely into the ground. Make sure your child cannot remove the stake from the ground before leaving them unattended.
Be sure to specify your color choice when you order!


And for that last added step of protection, should your child breach any of the above security measures, if you order NOW we'll throw in a brand new Child Guard! Attach the cute animal alarm to your child around his/her neck. You keep the other part discreetly in your pocket or purse. Should your child wander outside the set parameters, a low voltage shock will be distributed. When five shocks have been administered, a quiet alarm will sound, alerting you to go and collect your child from the ground. Be sure to bring them a change of clothes.

Is this set everything you've ever dreamed of? Have you thought about having children, but were afraid they were too much hassle? Put your fears to rest. With our award-winning line of KidStop™ products, you can parent from a distance with confidence.
Don't be fooled by cheap imposters that offer no security!
Operators are standing by!

10 Comments:

  • impromptu-mom

    LOL, Jules!
    Thank you for jump starting my Monday.

  • Brenda

    I love it!!!! I see more and more leashes at the mall every time we go, but I never thought of staking them!!!!!

  • Victoria

    Actually, my husband has thought about that low-voltage shock thing for quite some time.:)

    Where did you get these pics from? That's the scary thing!:)

    Thanks for the laugh. Happy Monday!

  • just a girl named jenn

    One word: HILARIOUS! Thanks for the laugh :)

  • Janice

    Does the one with the alarm really shock five times first?! OH.MY.

  • howtosavethekosmos

    Have you seen this blog post yet? http://octopusmom.wordpress.com/2008/08/04/couple-forgets-3-year-old-in-airport-true-story/

  • WendyMom

    U-N-B-E-L-I-E-V-A-B-L-E!

    This about made me wet my pants! But for one sobering fact- that I have actually SEEN people with these on their kids! It never ceases to amaze me the lengths to which people will go to avoid training their kids. Now they are reduced to dog status.

    Nice.
    Thanks for the grins!

  • JulieMom

    I must admit this was inspired by an actual sighting. It was funny because the parents let go, turned their backs, and the kid ran away!

    (hence the stakes)

    Anyway, all the pics are from the internet. And if there are parents out there who really need this, then use it.

    But I will laugh at you and silently judge your parenting skills.

    Because that's just one of the free services you can expect here at the Castle de JulieMom.

  • Mary

    Now that Miss Julie is the funniest blog you've made in quite a while. So very, very funny.

    You really should make a video of the routine and add it to you tube.

  • Erin

    I know you all will think I don't use the bible to train, but I will be honest for once in my life... I WANT ONE!!!!!!! AND I WANT ONE NOW with 3 links one for each MNM bro!!! If I could spank in public I would not be tempted to use one! But NO I must just try to coax my 2 year old not to touch the candy in the check out line that is specifically designed for weak parents! And with all the psychos in the world and my crazy nut 6 year old who think everyone who wears a Yankees hat is a kindred spirit and MUST be a sold out Christian! GIVE ME A LEASH!!!! I would like Walmart a lot more if I had one!

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