I Chronicles 29:11 "Thine, O LORD, is the greatness, and the power, and the glory, and the victory, and the majesty:for all that is in the heaven and in the earth is thine; thine is the kingdom, O LORD, and thou art exalted as head above all."

Monday, June 02, 2008

The Facebook Fiasco

It started out innocently enough. A friend sent me a request to view their photos on facebook. The only catch? I had to sign up for an account of my very own. What harm could it do? Now some 96-odd friends and too many requests for things I have no interest in later, I am considering abandoning the whole thing.

I mean, it's nice to be thought of and all, but to be honest I don't look forward to emails that only inform me that one of my facebook friends has 'thrown Paris Hilton' at me, or 'sucker punched' me. It's actually a burden.


Because my neurotic personality is such that I feel compelled to reply and do something back to every request I get. Whether I know the person well or not. Even though I'll never be the 'street racing' champion, or have the most tiaras, or earn the most greenbucks by giving other people flowers to stop global warming, (which I don't even think exists) the people-pleaser in me MUST respond.

It was this very thing that caused Little Sister and I to let our dolls sleep in the bed and us to sleep under it. You can't very well let just ONE in the bed. It's showing favoritism. The others will feel bad, and keep you up all night with their crying.

Is this an illness only I suffer from?

Please tell me I'm not alone.

Know what makes it worse? I am friends with people from my past that I don't even like. It's a disease. Now, if you're one of my facebook friends, please don't go wondering if you're the one that isn't really my friend in real life. Just let me assure you that (wink-wink, nudge-nudge) I like all my 'friends' the same.

Which brings me to my next thought.

Why is there a new thing called Top Friends?!?!?

Don't these people know how much pressure they put on me when they add me and I don't want to add them back because then I have to put everybody in, and as I've already confessed, I'm friends with people from my long ago past that I don't even like and that is just going overboard to put them in a Top Friends category just because everyone else is ending up there? Do they??? If they know this, then why do they do it to me?!?!?

I may be slowly losing my mind. And the rest of the posts this week may just confirm that. But please don't send me condolences or flowers on facebook. Because that may cause me to send a rocket launcher through my laptop, and slightly anger the Prince.

Just leave a comment. Because six comments for a whole WEEK worth of posts is depressing me a little. But not enough to make this my only world.

**crosses fingers behind back** I PROMISE.


  • Mary

    Look Jules, I am a little confused! Could you be a little clearer in what you're really saying, please. I mean, Do you like me or not? Am I in or what? I haven't known you for long so I know (at least) you're not referring to me concerning the old friends that you don't really like. I'm not on your face book, so I am ok in that aspect. I have left you a comment though, and you did leave one on mine. So, I wonder if now I fall under the category of you feeling obliged to leave one on mine? I guess up-front-ness is good. Yeah! It is good. Well, I like you, so I guess I'll just have to visit and wait and see if you like me. Good Idea! That's what I'll do. Must admit to feeling a little paranoid. Not really. Well, maybe a little!

    Ok, catch ya later!

  • Mary

    Hi Julie,
    It's me again. I feel bad. I feel really bad. I just went back through your weeks blogs - counting the comments. It was then that I stumbled on your Monday 26th blog 'When bloggy world is your only world'. Now I get it! I'm guilty! Possibly certifiable. Guilty of checking if I got a comment.Guilty of sharing with my' real' friends my 'bloggy' friends wisdom or adventures or sarcasm. What's worse (the very worse)is that I am fairly confident that my number of hits to my site is mainly due to my frantic obsession with becoming a 'successful' and 'popular' blogger. Guilty! Guilty! Guilty! I'm going to figure out how to get the email notification thingy bobby. That can be my first step in therapy.

  • Mary

    9,671 visitors. WOW, that is impressive!

    Ok, I'll stop now.

  • WendyMom

    I'm a little afraid for Mary.. I'm just sayin'

    Reading this post was a little like being back in 7th grade- "Does he like me? Could you find out? Ask him if he likes me..but if he says no, just tell me he said maybe. Find out, OK?" The worst thing ever happened to me in 8th grade. Our ex-hippie science teacher had us all tell each other exactly what we thought of the person who was supposed to be our best friend. My one friend basically said she thought I was fat, and while not exactly ugly, not exactly pretty either. What a nightmare for a 13 year old! I swear the teacher did it so we would all get upset and she could introduce us to "mind altering" substances... Ask Dege if she remembers this.

    Facebook- someone did the same thing to me a while back, and I bagged it after a while for all the same reasons. Good luck to you if you decide to keep on going with it. I just don't think it's a good idea given your, ahem, personal proclivities. You know, towards perfectionism and all.

    You know it's true, 'cuz I love you!

  • impromptu-mom

    Facebook is such an awful time trap! Although I outgrew the whole "I-Must-Be-Fair-To-Everyone" disease awhile ago, I know your pain. I remember when I first started blogging and I lived for those few comments that I would get. But soon, it lost it's fun, and it felt like an obligation. (which would be why I haven't really updated in oh... 6 or 7 months, lol.)
    You are a grown-up with grown-up emotions and feelings. Like wendymom said, it feels like seventh grade, but it's decidedly not. Even though it may feel cruel, you can't waste time feeling obligated to obligations that don't actually exist. You are such a sweet person to let this stuff weigh on your heart, but let me assure that the pain, annoyance, and inconvenience is just starting. If you are in such a conflict about it already, now is the time to delete and move on.

    And that concludes my high-handed, nosy sermon for the day, lol!

  • Janice

    yeah, I have a face book, and there it ends. I like it to see alot of pictures into the lives of the hoards of teens that I know from Summit, but for me as my own personal social network, I havent even figured out how to throw a sucker punch. I did figure out how to disable the option to have everything notified to me bu email.... not a good thing to have!

  • Anonymous

    Oh dear, I solemnly promise to never send you another flower on facebook again! By the way, you can access your account and stop all the e-mail notifications, it's very easy. I'm also a perfectionist, but the best thing to do is stop responding to the requests and enjoy it for what it is: a fun way to stay connected. One more thing, you don't have to accept friend requests from people you don't care to be friends with :) Just a thought...

  • Kristen

    Hey now -- you found *ME* on Facebook! So that makes you my Facebook stalker, no? ;-)

    I never respond to those stupid flowers or quizzes. I wish I could turn the darn things off.

  • JulieMom

    Ok, let me remind you that sarcasm is meant to be tongue in cheek. I don't really feel that pressured..

    But I am running over to facebook right now and ending the email nightmare.

    Thank you for telling me that is an option!!!

    *And I meant every !!! I used*

  • Brenda

    Oh I am so glad that I didn't sign up for that facebook invite I got a few months ago! So glad.

    Really? You can't just hit delete? I don't suffer from this. Sorry. Must be why I don't have a ton of old friends, huh?

    Now what is this about the dolls sleeping on the bed? I need to hear this story.

  • Aunt Bossy

    Hey there girl--I totally get what you're saying. But I find that the more you hit "ignore," the easier it is! I've even ignored stuff from you, and you are my favorite Julie sister! Now my obsession is trying to find you on Skype when we're both awake. Not easy with the two jobs, but I'll keep trying...forget Facebook, now I'm a Skype stalker! :-)

  • Michelle in Mx

    Do you know how liberating it was to practice pressing the "ignore" button!!!
    Do it!
    Do it often, and it gets easier.
    Tell you what, I'll send you a something and you click "ignore" just for practice.
    There is no notification when someone does not accept something.
    But, come on, do tell, how the heck to you get a bazillion points on the word challange . . .???!!!!

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