I Chronicles 29:11 "Thine, O LORD, is the greatness, and the power, and the glory, and the victory, and the majesty:for all that is in the heaven and in the earth is thine; thine is the kingdom, O LORD, and thou art exalted as head above all."

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Stupid Things I Used to Say; So Did You. (Yes, You Did.)

Yes, the trip to retro-ville yesterday made me reminisce about a lot of things from my growing-up-hood. And one of the things I was thinking of (other than bad hair and REALLY bad clothes) was stupid things we all said as kids.

For whatever reason, we thought these things made us SUPER COOL. And probably what I will share is familiar with you, but if not, just pretend I am normal, ok? Thanks.

The first thing we used to say, when someone was showing off, and trying to be better than anyone else, (whether it be how many times you can jump rope in one minute, or how fast you can run around the teeter-totters, or how fast you can say the word supercalafragilisticexpealidocious) was:

"You think you're hot snot on a silver platter, but you're really just a cold booger on a paper plate!"

As if either of those things are appetizing. HOT SNOT does not equal TASTY SNOT.
I know that now.

Or, if someone was being a smarty pants, and was basically causing the group of close-knit friends to, you know, become haters, I would say:

"You know, Smarty had a party, and no one came. Come on girls."

Then we would toss our hair (Well, I would shake mine because it was just an enormous afro-type clump) and walk away as a group. And leave 'Smarty' all alone.

When a group of boys was giving us unwanted attention, my little posse of girls would all do a very complicated hand-clapping-thingy, and end with our hands in fists, arms crossed in front of our chests, shouting:

"Cootie protection!! You cannot harm us!"

Zoinks! We were too cool indeed.

The following is a scenario seen on countless playgrounds during rousing games of kickball across America somewhere during the 1980s.

AwesomeDudeJockMan: (Speaking to the previously referred to 'Smarty') "Smooth move ExLax!" (When there is no response he continues.) "Hello...McFly, did you see the ball? Catch it!"

Smarty: (Bracing for a punch to the face) "Uh, my bad."

Smarty's Friend
: "AwesomeDudeJockMan, what's your damage? It's just a game."

AwesomeDudeJockMan: "No doi. This game is so lame. (As he leaves the field) I'm Audi 5000."

THIS conversation was classic sleep-over fodder amongst Junior High girls during my time:

Me: "Don't you think (insert hot guy from your class here) is gorgeous?"

Friend #1: "Shah. He's a total babe!"

Friend #2: "As if!! Grody! You can't be serious!"

Me: "Let's call him and hang up!"

Friend #1: "Cool beans! (swooning) I just want to hear his voice."

Friend #2: (Rolling her eyes) "Let's not and say we did."

Yeah, we were deep thinkers back then. Oh, the wonders of tweenage-hood! Thank God it's over now and I no longer think/speak/act that way.


What things do you remember saying that I left out? Someone somewhere has to remember these things. I know you're out there. Add your thoughts to the comments. Be there or be square.


  • FriedOkra

    "Aw, that's so TINY or SMURF(cute)!"
    "My hair is TRAGIC today"
    "I'm wantin' (insert word here) like a Big Dog."

  • jen

    I think you forgot the "to the max" after "grody"!!!
    ahhh. what a trip down memory lane...too bad caller I.D. is now the norm...no more hang-up calls! It was probably one of those guys who got called every time the girls had a sleepover who invented the technology!

  • T with Honey

    And don't forget, like, how a little later in the 80's like every few words you had to like throw in the word like.

    Like I totally go here from friedokra, and I think your blog is like so cool, Dudette!

  • JulieMom

    Thanks for all the reminders!! Reminiscing with strangers is so much fun...

    (Sweeping music starts)

    Like, totally thanks, like for all the like memories. Like, you are all totally awesome to the max!!

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